School has started this week for my sons. It is a bitter-sweet time as my oldest is now a Senior, big man on campus. I can’t believe he is a Senior. It seems like yesterday we were looking at high schools for him to attend and now he is nine months away from graduating. Time does fly.
I look at him and wonder have I done enough to prepare him for the world, yes he still has college to get through but chances are good he will be going away to college. There was an article in the Daily Mail that came out this week about a British research that listed parents top 20 regrets. In reviewing the regrets listed I couldn’t help but find myself thinking on each one, “is this me”?
The number one regret was working too much. I do know there was a couple of years in my oldest life where I did spend way to much time at the office working long hours, luckily, my weekends were still mainly free to spend time with him. Working those long hours, I didn’t gain anything. I didn’t make more money, get a big bonus at the end of the year or even a big promotions, heck I didn’t even get a thank you. Thankfully, I no longer work for that company and was able to find a company in which my hours were the “normal” 8-5.
The surprise, to me, of the 20 regrets listed was the number two regret, worrying about the little things. I guess the we realize later that some of the things we worried about, in the big picture of life, was little things, but at the present moment they seemed like such big things. I ask myself now since I still have several more years with my youngest, how can I change so that I worry less about the little things? How do I identify what the little things are? I know there are times when I do need to step back, take a deep breath ask myself, is this something that I really need to worry about? Is what ever the worst that could happen happens, will that harm someone or endanger a life? If not then maybe I should worry a little less, and let what happens happen because in the long run that is what will happen.
As a parent it is hard to not worry about our children and everything about them. However it probably is not healthy especially if our worrying interferes with the child experiencing life. Children need to fall down, make mistakes, bruise a knee. They also need to learn to pick themselves up, think for themselves, attempt to rationalize consequences. No I am not saying let them do what ever they want or fend for themselves, I am saying we probably need to worry a little less and not be as over protective. If I worry a little less about the little things, hopefully I can enjoy these remaining months and years with my children a whole lot more.
Click on the Daily Mail to link to the article about the study.
Life Happens from daviddust.blogspot.com